There are times in life when nothing
seems to go right, despite all our best efforts. We try our best, but our best just
isn’t good enough. Too much is being demanded of us; too much expected of us.
We get worn out and want to give up – just like Elijah in today’s 1st reading.
Elijah was maybe the most remembered
prophet of the Old Testament. He appeared abruptly - as if out of nowhere to
resist King Ahab and his pagan Queen, Jezebel, who had corrupted Israel’s
religion with worship of the foreign god Baal.
In competition with 450 prophets of
Baal on Mount Carmel, he had dramatically demonstrated God’s superiority over
Baal. He had then executed the 450 pagan prophets, and God had finally ended
Israel’s 3-year drought. But what should have been Elijah’s greatest moment of
triumph ended in frustration as he then had to flee from the Queen, who was determined
to kill him in revenge. So he descended
from the mountaintop of elation into the desert of despondency, which is where
we encounter him at the beginning of today’s reading [1 Kings 19:4-8] - on the run, exhausted in body, broken in spirit, filled with an overwhelming
feeling of failure: “This is enough, O
Lord! Take my life, for I am no better than my fathers.”
Most of us don’t lead such significantly
public lives. So our own dramas of frustration and failure seldom seem
so dramatic. Occasionally, the feelings of otherwise ordinary un-public people
sometimes spill out in public - even erupting in violent acts such as so many
of the ones we have witnessed over and over again in various cities around the
country. At the other extreme, some try, with greater or lesser degree of success,
to keep such feelings behind a defensive wall, in an attempt to insulate both
themselves and society from their effects. In between these extremes, feelings
of frustration and failure frequently spill out in bitterness, fury, anger, shouting, and reviling – malicious
behaviors, which Saint Paul [Ephesians 4:30 – 5:2]
said grieve the Holy
Spirit of God.
In contrast, Paul instructed the
Ephesians to be kind to one another,
compassionate, forgiving one another as God has forgiven you in Christ.
Of
course, that’s a lot easier said than done!
So
how does one get from here to there?
Ready to give up, Elijah fell asleep
under a tree. Awakened by an angel, he found the nourishment he needed (which
he obviously would not normally have expected to find there in the desert), a
sure sign that help was on the way. So depressed was he, however, that even
after eating and drinking, he fell asleep again - only to be wakened and fed
again. Apparently, Elijah was ready to
give up on God, but God was not willing to give up on Elijah.
God really was demanding a lot from
Elijah. Hence, God’s unwillingness to let him give up, but hence also his
readiness to help, to accompany Elijah on the way, personally providing him
with what he would need.
None of us is Elijah, of course. Yet
God does expect results even from us. Like Elijah, we too may be tempted at
times to feel that much is being expected of us. After all, who can really be
expected to be kind, compassionate, and
forgiving – especially when it seems to produce few if any results?
Just as God was prepared to accompany
Elijah and personally provide him with whatever he would need, he does the same
for us on our own difficult, tedious journey.
As Saint Paul has reminded us, Christ
loved us and handed himself over for us as a sacrificial offering to God.
Paul’s reminder is always timely – but never more so than in those times and
situations when we too feel discouraged and are tempted to give up.
As we have been hearing now week after
week, Jesus, the Bread of Life, is our very visible food for the journey – our
life-long journey out of the desert of bitterness,
fury, anger, shouting, and reviling to the mountain where, having
experienced for ourselves God’s kindness,
compassion, and forgiveness, we can at least begin to become in turn people of
kindness, compassion, and forgiveness for
the life of the world.
Homily for the 19th Sunday in Ordinary Time, Immaculate Conception Church, Knoxville, TN, August 9, 2015.
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